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Temper Tantrums

Temper tantrums. Screaming, sobbing, flailing of arms and kicking of legs, red faces, crocodile tears, and more.

Most of us have seen temper tantrums in full-blown action, especially if we’ve been around a toddler who isn’t getting his or her way. I’ve watched my own young children and grandchildren engage in their share. And, I’m sure if you asked my mother, she could describe my toddler temper tantrums in spicy detail!

But, are temper tantrums reserved just for toddlers? Do we ever outgrow them? Or, do we as adults just change our behavior around the tantrum?

Instead of screaming and kicking, do we evolve to:

  • shrieking words at high decibel levels?
  • spurting speech that cuts the hearts of its intended recipients?
  • spewing anger and guilt on anyone in our path?
  • assuming the martyr role and loving every minute of our sordid history?

After all, whether we are 2 or 92, we know best! Or do we?

After all, if we resist change, we will be safe.

Or will we?

Of course, life is unfair. Or is it?

Certainly, if we refuse to forgive, the perpetrators will suffer. Really?

Maybe we don’t outgrow temper tantrums because of fear. Fear of what will happen if we surrender and embrace what is, instead of what was or what we want it to be.

Perhaps the paradox is that when we actually decide to surrender our way to a Higher Power, we discover a better way.

When we go with the flow of life, we find joy.

When we express gratefulness, we see the glass as half full.

When we choose to forgive, we discover peace.

When we embrace life in all that it offers, we become free.

And, when we release our fears and love ourselves unconditionally, we find that others were there for us all along.

So, in this moment, I determine to exchange tantrums for triumph. What a wonderful way to live!

Comments (3)

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    Shana Stadler


    Boy, to any who has ever taught….teachers and parents everywhere can identify and say a resounding, “Yep, sounds familiar!” Sometimes, it was a student but more times (as a former administrator of a small elementary school), it was a disappointed parent or upset teacher!
    We can often direct our disappointment at loved ones or even at God. I like how encouraging your words are that we don’t have to yield or “be stuck” in a temper tantrum mentality! We all have times of trial and challenges but think what we can learn from redirecting our hurts and letting go!


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    Linda Bannick


    Yes, I believe temper tantrums go on into adulthood….just in different ways, as you said…just never thought of it. Your encouragement of complete surrender is the way of life and love because it’s what God wants. I especially needed the part about releasing fears and “loving ourselves unconditionally”. Why is that so hard? Thank you, Patty. I’ll love you always. Linda


    • Avatar

      Patty Bilhartz


      Yes, we like to hang on instead of letting go! The adventure with God is sometimes scary, but I do believe that Love can Trump Fear every time.


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